be an excellent security guard …or… be a terrible FBI agent

At some point in every young lad’s life, there is a desire to wield a gun, wear a badge, and kick some bad guys crass mouth.

FBI agents get to do just that. They have the badge and the gun. When it comes to protecting and serving, these guys are top notch. In the eyes of normal, everyday, run of  the mill citizens these guys (and gals) are superheroes.

But what about that one guy who barely passed the entrance exam? That guy who only got the job because his uncle runs the department. The one who crashes his Prius into a crime scene. You know, that guy who does paper work all day.

Would working for the FBI be worth it if you were the worst?

I don’t think I would like it. I’m sure the perks would be nice. I could brag to the chicks. The pay would definitely be better then working security. But I would be miserable.
Being an FBI agent is about the action, the pride in knowing you are making a difference, the respect! You don’t get that if you’re terrible and end up pushing papers all day.

I know what you’re thinking though.
“It doesn’t matter how terrible of an FBI agent you are, it is better then being a security guard!”

Well, I beg to differ.

If I am an excellent security guard then I will have respect from my co-workers and employers. Sure, society may think I am nothing more than a second rate rent-a-cop but I would prove them wrong.

I share the views. I have ran into many lowly security guards who let their law enforcement fantasies take their ego on a power trip.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.
I wouldn’t settle to be some parking lot cop. My mission would be to become private security for a big shot CEO or celebrity. Thats when things get glorious.

I would be paid well.
I would be issued a firearm.
I could wear cool leather jackets and slick black shades.
Plus, I would be excellent.
No evildoer would get past me.
I would guard the objective and keep my perimeter secure.
I would inspire children.
I would be the hope for security enforcers everywhere.